I've thought a lot about friendship this past year,
what it is
what it means
how it works, etc.
The only thing that I've concluded, thus far,
by this year's end
is that you cannot
have a friend
without
being a friend,
and being a friend is a lot of work.
It's not too much, but it is a lot. And much of it is about
the silent contract
of being a friend.
And so,
what is a friend?
What does it mean to be a friend?
How does friendship work?,
especially in this Age of Social Media &AI, etc.
And this is when the bodybuddy/lifemate taught me how to woo a girl.
"I want to be her friend, though," I lament one day about a former private pupil of mine who is now a grown young woman. "You ask her stuff," he responds. "What? No way. I'm not gonna just ask her stuff," I scoff. "It's how it's done," he insists. "Like what kind of stuff?" intrigue building in my mind. "Present two options and have her pick one," he explains and continues, "That's what I did to you."
vroop. vroop.
"What the fuck?"
"What?"
"You did what to me?"
"I asked you so many questions when I was wooing you."
"Like what kinds of questions?"
"Oh, like super low-stakes questions at first. You know, stuff that takes zero effort from you, but I gain everything if you answer. Sometimes you wouldn't answer. Or you would just laugh. This is all stuff I can work with."
"What the fuck!"
"What!"
"You were just poking around trying to get answers out of me those whole three months we dated before moving in together?"
"Yea."
"Oh."
"How else was I supposed to get to know you?"
"Oh."
"You liked it."
"Liked what?"
"Having your mind probed."
"Yea, duh."
"That's how I got you."
"By penetrating my mind. Over and over again."
"Endlessly."
"Yea, and then we would fuck pretty hard."
"Yea."
"K, fine. I'll just ask her some questions. Like an idiot."
"It'll work."