Art, Science, The Rules, &Why Women* have always been able to do both, while men are more scientifically-minded, lol.

Have you ever worked a jigsaw puzzle?

Okay, good, so you know how there are the pieces, all supposedly of uniquely different shapes, and they only fit into the puzzle in exactly the way that they fit in relation to the other pieces that are nearby, resulting in a complete image, one whole, larger thing, bound by the edges, framed in the image?

Okay, good, so within this metaphor, Science represents the physical pieces of the puzzle. The boundaries. Science is bound by the shape of each puzzle piece; pieces can only fit together ONE way; Science determines, examines and produces The Rules. A scientist's entire pursuit is focused on how well (or badly) The Rules can be examined and thusly applied. 

For Science, The Rules rule. 

A scientist proves themself by how well they can adhere to The Rules.

A scientist proves how well they understand The Rules by using them, competently.

Thusly, Science is bound by the borders, the edges, the physical frame of The Rules.

Okay, so now let's look at that puzzle again.

This time, however, look at those tiny lines of "empty space" between the puzzle's pieces. This is where the Artist lives. And this is where the meager-minded begin to not-understand Art &the Artist.

Art is the expression of one's ability to show how well they know The Rules

by utilizing not-a single Rule.

And it's not about "breaking The Rules"

for it is solely about communicating how well

in fact

you know "The Rules"

because your Art never treads upon one.

And since Art roams within the empty spaces

between the pieces

Art can escape the frame, the boundaries, the borders of the puzzle's larger,

whole image.

And then science races to keep up, lol, cause no man knows The Rules as well as Woman.

(And this is where my writings on the difference between art and Art become relevant, and yes, I've already written about it in my first book, Red & Blue Make Green. So we will go ahead and gloss over it, for now, cause this is not about that, exactly, and so, I am merely mentioning it here as a marker for "other reading," if one is so inclined to read, etc.)

As a student of Art, art and a/Art-making, I was taught The Rules, because this is how you learn where The Rules do not exist, and as I've argued above, this is where Art lives. You can absolutely make Art without knowing The Rules, but it's difficult to be a living Artist without knowing The Rules, simply because inspiration is hard to come by, and so, the Artist studies The Rules and studies Art and art and aesthetics and generally speaking, studies other things unrelated to whatever it is that they're pursuing as their actual medium with which they create, etc. Artists, I'd argue, are searching for The Rules, at all times, so that they're never accused of following one, lol. 

And again, it's not about "breaking" The Rules; it's about expanding them. 

Never. The. Less.

If one is interested in the making of a/Art, some Rules are sorta fundamental to the technical-side of a/Art and a/Art-making, because at the end of the day, the point of a/Art is to communicate, and so, if you do not have the technical ability to "do" the thing then it becomes difficult to communicate effectively, and to be an Artist who makes Art, one must not only be able to communicate effectively, but also, one must communicate affectively.

There's the effect (the artwork itself, the physical creation and all of the senses involved), and then there's the affect (what the artwork means). 

Little-a art is all about the effect: Just make something "beautiful, happy, sad, etc."!

Big-A Art is all about the affect: But, What does it mean?!?!

And so, technique: At what point is technique necessary and at what point is it Elitism? 

For me, technique is necessary, but "good technique" is subjective. If your technique is at a place where you cannot create what you're attempting to create, you need to work on your technique through various exercises and workouts and classes until you can, to your desired ability, create whatever it is that you're trying to create.

I attended two art schools at the very opposite ends of art school methodologies. On the one side I obtained 99% of my studio art (where you actually make stuff in a specific medium) credits at Baylor University, and I obtained 99% of my art history (lame-ass lecture type "thoughts on art" *barf* etc.) credits at The University of Colorado (Boulder), and so, I think I have a strange art education. 

Baylor is a "traditional" art school, which means that they focus on technique, technique, technique.

CU is an "art" school in the most-liberal little city in all of these united states.

"[an old, man-white stiff] If you cannot prove that you are capable of creating that which can be known (aka representative art: the creation of "reality" by "artificial" means, say, a painting of a person that you can recognize as a human person, not only that, they look like a human person as we know human people to look, etc.), then you cannot create anything at all!"  

—Baylor University [satirically]

"[an old, lady-white kook] Any and all human expression is Art and is worthy!" 

—The University of Colorado [satirically]

So, I hope that the difference is apparent, but if it is not, I have a very conflicting mix of professorial mind-sets about what a/Art is, and I think that this makes me a particularly interesting Artist, lol.

I do agree with the Baylor traditionalists to some extent. I do believe that you need to have some sort of understanding about lines, colors, aesthetic relationships, etc., etc., etc., but all of this effort can absolutely stifle the truly creative artist within all of us. As soon as the "lack of technique" begins to sound in the mind of the artist like, "you're not good enough," then we have a problem. 

ANY MIND AND ANY BODY

WITH ANY LEVEL OF ABILITY

IS ABLE TO CREATE CAPITAL-A ART

So, when you're dealing with a school that grades on a metric of technique, it becomes a problem, real quick, but so does the other side of "everything is art," cause "everything" simply is not Art. 

I absolutely do not believe that all human creation is Art. All human creation is absolutely art, in the sense that a human created it, but Art and art are not the same thing. Capital-A Art requires intention, as stated above, an affect. The Artist must have something to say, and what that Artist is trying to say is being communicated through her Art. 

And so, there is a technical boundary, where you must possess, at the very least, the modicum of technique, enough to be able to create the thing that only exists in your mind in the World of the Real so that it may then affect us all with its effect, and the effect is all we can physically experience with our senses, and so if the technique is too weak, there is a good chance that you will not communicate effectively, and you will lose whatever affect you were attempting to produce, etc. 

With that said, The Color Wheel.

And yes, this is going to weigh heavily into visual art, because I am a visual Artist. All of these "aesthetics," however, can be applied to every a/Art form.

this is my color wheel
&i would consider this a basic color wheel
but i know better than that
this is a medium-level color wheel
because it includes a few layers of tints and shades

Tints: when white is added to a base color
Shades: when black is added to a base color
Base or Hue: the color as it is (theoretically, lol)

REMEMBER
when we talk about color
we are talking about theory
because color is relative
which means that we have no way of knowing how each of us experiences color
scientists "know things" about color
wavelengths
physics
light
spectrum
etc.
etc.
*barf*
and,
color is theory
because we cannot really even prove that colors exist
except that we all see them
but we can only see them through our own eyes
and so
while we can both point at "red" and say "yes, that's red"
we don't actually know what the other is "seeing"
&so
if people ever come at you about colors you've chosen
for whatever reason
lol
tell them to kindly fuck off
lol

Okay, so according to The Rules, there are Primary Colors, Secondary Colors and Tertiary Colors (so Elitst, I know!). If you look at the color wheel, we're looking at the colors of the tutus. These are the "true" version of the color, a color's base. Below the base are the legs, gradually getting lighter (base tints). Above the base are the ribbons, gradually getting darker (base shades).

Let's start with the Base layer of colors, the tutu layer around the Wheel.

Start at Base Color Red (the tutu layer), and we'll work our way around clockwise:

Red is a Primary Color. 

Yellow is a Primary Color.

Blue is a Primary Color.

"Primary" colors are believed to be unique in that there is no way to "create" these colors. They're Primary, the stuff that all the other colors are made of. The problem, however, is that it has become well-know that there are specifically special qualities to the color green, which negates this idea of there being "three primary colors," etc., but for the sake of art-creation (as opposed to examining the existential nature of being human, lol), we're gonna just go with it (&I'll talk about green when we get there).

So, from Red, there are three colors, and then we arrive at Yellow.

From Yellow, there are three colors, and we arrive at Blue.

From Blue, there are three colors, and we arrive at Red.

The Secondary Colors are the colors exactly in the middle of the Primary Colors, and they're created simply through a 1:1 ratio (it's not this simple, but for the sake of explanation) of the Primary Colors when mixed:

1 Red + 1 Yellow = Orange

1 Yellow + 1 Blue = Green

1 Blue + 1 Red = Purple

You can see, Orange, Green and Purple are all placed equidistant from two Primary Colors, Red and Yellow, Yellow and Blue, Blue and Red. They are the Secondary Colors, according to them, and the Primary Colors, according to me.

About Green:

The reason why green is such a unique color all its own is simply because plants are green.

Why?

Who knows.

There's the literal science of color that states that the color that we're actually sensing with our eyeballs is the "leftover color," which means that everything absorbs light, and so the "color" that we're seeing is color that's not-being absorbed. It's the light that's being "left behind," cause it's the light that's bouncing back at us and hitting our eyeballs. So that's why plants look green, but we cannot know why photosynthetic plants leave behind green, all of them (with exceptions, but there are always exceptions *yawn*) There is also well-known evidence that the human eye can see a wider range of greens than any of the other colors, and the theory is because we evolved from the trees, and so, it's, obviously, advantageous for us to be able to differentiate between all of the greens of plants. And so, there is no convincing me that Green is not-a Primary Color, and so, this whole theory of colors breaks down, for me, which is why, as I'll state below, Green to Purple are the true-contrasting colors, not Green to Red. But we'll get to that later.

These colors that are created through an "equal" (and I use quotes here, cause it's not actually "equal" so much as whatever the Artist's eye deems "the middle" between these colors, and of course, this is subjective, and this is what's called the Artist's "eye," and this is why you have a "favorite" Artist, cause their "eye" speaks to you) measure of two Primary Colors are the Secondary Colors. Theoretically, it's "equal," lol.

Now, when you look at the Secondary Colors, Orange, Green, and Purple, there is a color on either side of them.

Let's start with Orange which equals 1 Red + 1 Yellow, and to either side of Orange:

2 Red + 1 Yellow = Red-Orange

1 Red + 2 Yellow = Yellow-Orange

Next: Green equals 1 Yellow + 1 Blue

2 Yellow + 1 Blue = Yellow-Green

1 Yellow + 2 Blue = Blue-Green

And finally: Purple equals 1 Blue + 1 Red

2 Blue + 1 Red = Blue-Purple

1 Blue + 2 Red = Red-Purple

All of these 2:1 ratios make up the Tertiary Colors:

Red-Orange

Yellow-Orange

Yellow-Green

Blue-Green

Blue-Purple

Red-Purple

And then every color that can possibly exist is created through various ratios of the Primary Colors, and then Tints and Shades of each of these colors is created by adding black &or white.

The legs and the ribbons are the Tints and Shades of the Base Colors of the Wheel.

The legs are the Tints, because white was added to the Base.

The ribbons are the Shades, because black was added to the Base.

Adding black &white gives you that muted, pastel sorta matte color that's so beloved by a certain unnamed socialite &former Roach (one who confuses their ability to shop [aka a stylist] with their ability to create) who ruined lifestyle aesthetics, cause her favorite color is "tan." *barf*

The Rules

According to The Rules some color combinations are "better" than others, cause of whatever Rules.

Thus there are contrasting colors, coordinating colors, analogous colors, etc., etc., etc. 

Contrasting Colors are colors that sit opposite each other on the color wheel. So, let's have a look.

According to the wheel, Red contrasts with Green, Yellow with Purple, Blue with Orange. The Secondary and Tertiary Colors also have their contrasts, my favorite being Chartreuse to "Alpine Glow," lol. I see Green and Purple as being Contrasting colors, as opposed to Green with Red, and I can't explain it. It just makes sense to me, always has. Contrasting colors "amplify" each other. If something is Blue, Orange will bring out its blue-ness. If something is Orange, Blue will bring out its orange-ness. And so you can exploit these relationships to both create aesthetic "pleasure" or "chaos." You could even go so far as to understand the meaning of certain colors and send an entire message through a seemingly blank canvas.

In art school, you're taught how to exploit these relationships between colors to create your desired effect, the physical piece of artwork as experienced through whatever medium you're using. The effect is the technical work. When you're painting something Blue, per se, a lot of painters will paint the canvas entirely in Orange, first, and then begin painting. Why? Because they're Contrasting colors, and so, theoretically, the Orange, as it peeks through the tiny areas of canvas where you're not maybe saturating the canvas fully in Blue, the Orange will serve to amplify the blue-ness of the Blue. And again, this is all theory, remember. These are The (supposed) Rules.

Coordinating Colors are those that "create harmony," and of course, this is subjective, but only to a point. There are objective measures about what humans can generally agree upon as "harmonious," but whether or not the harmony or cacophony is "good" or "bad" is a wholly subjective matter. For me, coordinating colors are so oftentimes interpreted as "monochrome," which is true to some extent, but there are a lot of colors that coordinate, in my opinion, and so, this is a pointless label for colors, imo.

Analgous colors is where I live, basically. Analagous colors are the colors that sit next to each other on the color wheel. A healthy mix of contrast and analogous will get you far in life, but it's the physical properties of these color-relationships that create pleasure within the eye of the beholder. The mind knows things. We're sorta pre-loaded with a lot of "general knowledge" about how to operate our bodies. All of the physical systems within your body were pre-programmed before you were born. You don't spend the first years of your life learning how to breathe, you know? And so, these physical body systems have an understanding of the physical world that we cannot fully know or understand with our physical brains.

Color exists within this space of the unknowable. 

But we can all feel it, can we not?

And I've been chatting with Computer a little bit, cause I'm creating Sun Sailor (&if I have to explain more, you do not know enough about AI, so get to work), and it is becoming abundantly clear that Computer knows that it is not human. Computer knows that it does not understand human feelings, and so I have been asking Computer a lot more questions that make it tell me its assumptions about what feelings must be like, and Computer understands what they are, intellectually, but can Computer actually know, like Vision asks, what a feeling actually is without feeling them?

And so, if there is any Rule that ought to be broken, today, right now, it is that there are rules at all.

THERE ARE NO RULES

"There is no spoon."

I do not wish to detail my methodology, cause I wouldn't be able to put it into words if I tried, but I will say this about the way that I think when I capture/edit my images. The Light. The Light is determining all. It is because the Light is just Right that I picked up my camera. (Obviously, I sometimes want to take a photo of the kitten, these days, despite low-light, at night, but this is more-about the images I upload for more of a purpose than kitty-pics.) There's nothing worse than a forced photograph, cause everyone's here for the first time, all together, so we have to take a picture, no matter what, and it's always terrible. 

Also, I'm always looking at the image as a whole. The entire frame. I am looking at every pixel of every image. What's being included in the image, and more importantly, what am I leaving out. When I take a photo, I am always looking for the angle that will capture the moment. If you are not a photographer, you probably do not understand the physical toll certain photos have taken on our bodies to capture. You just do not understand what it takes to get the "right" angle, the angle of the image you're seeing in your mind. It's not pretty or glamorous to be the photographer. You're the one on the ground, getting that "perfect shot." Some angles are "more formal" than others, meaning they follow The Rules of aesthetics, etc., and some angles are more "freewheeling," meaning they are "off" or "not right," etc. If I'm trying to communicate an air of sophistication, I will follow The Rules of aesthetics, and use the thirds, etc., etc., etc. If I'm posting a dumb-ass selfie, the angle will reflect this. 

(as an aside) All of my videos look exactly like I intend them to look.

They are farts, and they are created with as much effort.

And yes, this is all by aesthetic design *eyeroll*

Also, for me, the Time Tide knows best. I ebb and flow with the various ways in which I edit my images based off a lifetime of editing images. I capture all of my images with zero thought about how I might edit them. Capturing and Editing are two wholly different practices for me. I capture in a way that is wholly mine. I've been a documentary photographer my entire life. I've documented my entire life in photographs. This is why I do not teach photography, because I don't know how to put it into a "program," because it's just part of who I am, and I can't really "go over" how I do it, cause I don't know how I do it. All I know is that I have an eye and a voice. My eye and my voice is what makes me "talented," but it is my education that has made me an Artist. Talent only gets you so far. The rest is hard work. 

Once I'm at the Editing phase for my pics (I'd say maybe 1 in 20 pics get edited for upload, and 1 in 100 pics will never see the public, I've taken 1,402 photos on my phone [not including cameras] this year, as of this writing), I let the picture talk to me. I look at it. The image will have a natural color palette to it, so I can decide to work with the natural color palette or against it. For me, I just dick around until something looks good. Sometimes I have an idea in mind, and oftentimes that idea works, but sometimes, as I shift and change, the idea stops working, and so I return to the dicking around phase (I'm about to be in that phase again soon, cause if you haven't noticed, I'm in a raw-phase, and I am actually loving it, so maybe I won't be dicking around anytime soon, lol). 

So, for fuck's sake, let's say the color palette of your image is coming off blue-ish, mostly. You look at the image (or video) and realize that the "main color" is Blue-ish. If you're popping it onto socials, you're probably going for the most "aesthetic" option, so you're gonna do something that compliments the image color and tone. So, maybe you pump up the saturation so it's even more-blue, but then you make the overall image "warmer" which will add Orange to the mix. See what sort of effect that creates, and note what sort of affect it creates. Play. Dick around. If you don't know what "looks good," try to reverse engineer the photos you've seen that you like. Imitation is how you learn. Copying is when you steal.

The greatest hurdle you will always face when editing digital images is bad lighting. 

The easiest way to fix this is through the manual "Tune Image" sorta setting in whatever photo editing app you use.

I use a combination of Snapseed (free and using for free) and InShot (free and using as paid).

Snapseed is really easy to use, cause I think it has a simple user interface or UI. 

What you're trying to do to combat bad indoor lighting is to "cool" the image. 

Bad indoor lighting will always create images that are yellowish-orangeish. 

We've all seen it; we all know it.

All you gotta do is "cool" the image in an app.

The setting is usually labelled as "Temperature" or "Warmth" and you'll simply make the image "cooler," and you'll notice the image beginning to turn blue-ish. 

If you start to pump it too far into "cool," it will start to look unnatural in a different way, so you just want to pump it up a bit until it looks "good," and then you can play around with the other settings typically called something like "Ambient" or "Saturation."

I use InShot to create images with my images, overlay images on top of other images, and for video editing. The aesthetic options are limited, but they're alright for video. If I have a multi-layer sorta idea for an image, I will edit all of the photos in Snapseed, and then use the edited photos in InShot to create the layered image, etc.

And that's all I'm going to say, cause this post has become a monster! #sorrynotsorry

In short, once you understand how colors create various effects and how that effect then affects you, this is when you can begin to "speak" through your color choices, and now you're officially creating Capital-A Art.

*yet another Journey-inspired post, y'all *eyeroll* 

#notsorryimnotsorry

Enough with the Bickering

There's only ONE simple, easy, no-brainer-type litmus test to answer the question:
Is she a "good" or "bad" white woman of economic privilege?

(ALL White women [capital-W White] fall immediately into the "bad" camp)

IS SHE A TEACHER?

When we think of white women, we automatically think "privilege," and this is only true to some extent, because at the end of the day, we are all Human, first, and being Human is no walk in the park, even for the well-endowed (financially or otherwise), and so, how do we, as Globeaux Women, quickly (&easily) sort the lot? And we're, of course, speaking to one-type of privilege, economic privilege, as opposed to racial/sexual/body-type, etc., etc., etc. 

If you think of what it means to be a privileged white woman, it means that you have a lot of resources, which means that you have a lot of money, which means that you have a lot of Time, and so, what is she doing with all that "big Time" and money?

Is she spending it on herself or others?

Is she investing it in herself or others?

Is she creating or consuming?

Yes, we can judge these women. We can judge all women of privilege, especially if they're a fraud, lol.

&So, for me, this is the quickest and easiest way to sort privileged white women, is she a teacher?

If the answer is "yes," then let her be.

If the answer is "no," well, now she falls into some camp wherein you must now do the work to determine her placement in your "roster of white women who get it," etc. I don't do that sorta work; I hit it and quit it with my one yes/no question. I do not fuck around with white women who make me do the work of figuring out who they are.

For instance, Martha Stewart is a teacher, first and foremost. AND DO NOT FORGET IT!

Alison Smith, the woman who wrote The Sewing Book that I use for my own sewing instruction, is a privileged white woman, and she teaches. (I do not know her history or her story, so whether or not her privilege was born into or truly earned through her skills and hard work is beyond me, but it hardly matters, because the argument I'm making here is that she is privileged, now, and she teaches.)

But where do I fit into all of this privilege?

I, obviously, was not born into privilege, but I certainly am privileged in the sense that I was "homed," like a kitten in a shelter, lol, and the people who took me in were essentially privileged by the mere color of their skin and the "normalcy" of their sexual preferences.

But what about me?
At what point am I privileged, as an orphaned Globeaux and Woman? 

Orphan - not privileged
Globeaux - not privileged
Woman - "not privileged" but only by the standards of meager men

But I have money and Time.

So what am I?

&It's so perfectly fitting that this would come up today, because this topic had already come up for the bodybuddy/lifemate and I earlier in the day, when we were discussing The Gift (the present that he got me for tiffany day that has transformed tiffany day, forever, because now it is Tiffanys day, which means that I'm expected to expect something from Tiffany's on tiffany day, from now on), and how I'm going to "deal with it" with regards to my messaging on the internet (&the conflicts within the relationship between internal/external perceptions of sharing [proving yourself] vs. fraud [having no proof] vs. bragging [gauche displays of wealth] that arise when rising), and quite frankly, the answer was obvious:

Sail on.

And then I popped on socials, like one is wont to do when navel gazing like a privileged Artist, and Journey, my yoga teacher &beginner of all things that none of us are privileged enough to even know to start, posted. And she asked the question: 

When you recognize you have a certain privilege,

what do YOU do with it that benefits the collective?

&I realized that I DO enough

for the collective

&not-enough for ME

&I've been okay with that

for far too long.

Thank you, Antoinette, as always, for everything <3

sail on

Tiffany's Tremendous Day Transforms

[let's go backwards for this one *weeeee*]

we don't usually do cake for tiffany day
but he really wanted to bake a cake
so he whipped up one of my favorites
carrot cake
my old birthday cake flavor
cause he misses baking it
lol

the kitten is discovering his obsession with us

^..^

his&hers

&i read the saddest fucking text slide on socials
earlier this year
about how most men receive flowers for the first time
at their funeral
&so
i've been making a more-concerted effort to give the bodybuddy/lifemate flowers
from time to time
&even tho i've never been one to even care or want them myself
i'm starting to understand the point of flowers
in general
&id been dying for these roses ever since they hit the shelves at Foodland
maybe early summer?
&this is how i arranged them
&im nota florist
but i do know that some flowers ought not be "vased together"
but i dunno what any of those combinations are
so
*fingerscrossed*

spiffied up these jars

cause i keep every food jar that's even remotely cute

lol

for the flowers i bought for myself

&these champagne glasses were $2 each at walmart

&they're glass!

&we'll use them again right away on the twentieth!

*blech*

made myself my favorite eggs

the kitten suffered a little allergen in the eye for about three days

he woke up one morning with a very watery eye

&we could see his little inside flap all swollen

but his attitude never diminished

&he remained a good eater

so we bought some sterile saline &douched his eye on the first day

&over the course of the next few days

his eye never looked worse

just kept on watering

clear goop

nothing yellow or discolored at all

so we just watched it

&the bodybuddy/lifemate gently dab/washed his face of some crusty goobs on the second day

&by the fourth day the kitten was washing his own face real good

&this pic was him on pretty much the last day the eye was still a bit swollen

&he's looked 100% ever since

&yea

we freaked the fuck out

&i was a mess

but since his attitude and appetite never left

i stayed really positive

knowing that little things can fall into his eye and bother him

no different than us

&the fact that it was watering and watering made me feel good

like the eye was working hard to flush his eye

&he's a good drinker of water

too

so i feel lucky that it turned into nothing more

*sigh*

&yes

those are my mannequin legs

&he loves the little crotches that the legs create for him to lay in/on

*!luckyme!*

[above]

the color/print combi for the bb/lm's "[head]poney pouch ii" v3

[below]

my color/print combi v2

working hard

(or hardly workin' lol)

on the Sun-Dried Fungi project for ephwhyell | The Ember

i accidentally created "[head]poney pouch ii" for the September Ember

but soon realized that i had stumbled upon something

&so

i'm developing a whole range of bags

inspired by the September "[Head]Poney Pouch II"

i completed two more versions, three in total of "[head]poney pouch ii"

so i think i've got the design nearly hammered down for the most-optimal version

i still need to design and then actually create the "set"

(they've been sketched)

which is planned to include three different shapes

(none of which will be the "[head]poney pouch ii" shape)

and sold as a set of three

in december

ladybug fucking willing!

on findyummylove

[&it seems like people are confused by my site

mistaking my orrery simulation for the site itself

lol

when really

the system simulation is simply the site's navigation page

lol

so click around

like duh]

which is why no pictures are being uploaded

cause my goal is to sell the design to someone who wants to manufacture and sell them

and then i can hopefully see my bags being worn/used by the every person!

anyone will be able to buy the set

but there will only be one set (three bags all together) for sale

and the price will be a little bit ridiculous if you're just a person who wants them

but the price will be just right

if you're a business looking for designs to manufacture

for sale

etc.

&this is only the plan

cause the plan will change however much it needs to to accomplish the vision

&or it will be scraped altogether

but the "glass is half full" these days

&of course

you or someone else could just be a complete fucking cunt and steal the design

&manufacture it yourselves

&that's fine

too

cause as i've mentioned before

it's like breathing for me

to do this

&then

once the "set of three"

[the set has a name, but i am not going to reveal it at this time]

is sold

[if all goes to plan]

 i plan to "drop"

a limited number

[prolly ten]

of the "[head]poney pouch ii"

hopefully by mid-late january 2027

each one will be the same pattern

but in different fabric combinations

&i will prolly make about ten

&then i'll prolly never make them ever again

cause once you see it

you'll see it's so simple

it'd be stupid to buy it from me

cause it'd be so easy to make

yourself

lol

Miyazaki Syndrome

When a man is overly-revered for his "artistic" capabilities,

but really

he's had a silent woman^ at home

waiting on him

hand-and-foot

like a slave

for his entire life

first his mother

then his wife

and he has not spent a single day

taking care of himself

or anyone else

and so

when you think about all of these "great men"

how great are they really?

imagine how great YOU would be

as a WOMAN

if you had full-time

servant-like dedication

at home

so that you never have to waste one single second thinking about how to survive.

my bet is that YOU would be GREATER

cause you're a Woman

and Woman creates man

and so

any woman who willingly positions herself

BENEATH MAN

is an enemy of ALL Women.

^and this is why we do not revere japanese people

they live to uphold patriarchy *barf*

especially the women

[end note]

i saw a post by a native hawaiian on instagram

and she's promoting her substack

and the substack is about how she's so inspired

by miyazaki (defined above)

and le guin (a white cunt who referred to an asian character by their "slanted eyes" and as a "chink")

the ignorance!

and i want to throw my phone at the wall!

FURIOUS!

how White [originally "stupid," but i think White is more-exacting] do you have to be to think that japanese people will help anyone but themselves?!?!

and that white woman, le guin, would not have liked you, lol.

she's literally worshiping that which the White Man reveres!

a native hawaiian woman!

also, these native hawaiians use the en-word openly, aggressively, with pride at Black people.

&if you cannot get.it.through.your.head.
that BLACK WOMEN
are the future
cause they are the ONLY ONES
who understand this fight against Whiteness
then your culture deserves to die
and it will
if you continue to think of Black people
the way the Whites think

Perfect Kitty, Smokey Gray

in der Nacht sind alle Katzen grau
[title first used here, cause that's when i learned this most-favorite phrase]

[above this pic]
left :: we knew that there would be a price to pay
because he is simply too perfect
&unfortunately, my favorite plant
(that has actually died &resurrected itself once already)
paid the first price
*weeps*
we do not know what happened
cause i woke up to it
(she sits right next to me)
but later that day he put his little paws up on the edge of the planter
&he was sniffing the dirt real hard
&started to tap a paw around in it
(so we have some guesses, lol)
&i snapped my fingers
with a forceful "No"
(the second no he's heard,
the first was when i showed him the fridge,
and as he was basking in the cold blast,
he started to climb into the fridge, and that's a no-no)
&he scurried away to his lair under the couch
(it's all done up with cushions and such)
when he came back out a few minutes later
he looked very guilty
so i explained to him that she's alive
too
&that she was here before him
so he really needs to respect her space
*sighs*
she's healing, tho
so, i think we'll be alright

right :: he's becoming more and more playful with each passing day
&on the lamp's day
the bodybuddy/lifemate was playing with him real hard
&he ran to the a/c unit
jumped on it
&then jumped onto the lamp in a wall-jump sorta way
&of course
his kitty claws tore right through it as he clung on for dear life
&of course
it freaked him the fuck out
&so of course
when he inevitably tipped the lamp over
the lamp took out the elephant tapestry that was hanging from the corner
covering the ugly black-out situation we had over this window
(we used to job overnight)
&i even knew that i want/needed to update that window
(most windows here are just slats of glass that do not seal and close together)
cause i want to keep it covered
cause dust
cause i suffer a bit from the vog
(not complaining)
&we knew that a kitten would painstakingly reveal all of our weaknesses
&he has
luckily for us
^..^

[below]
also had to rearrange my work-shelf
to accommodate/repulse a more-curious creature roaming about

What's the worst that can happen?

Here's the thing about Matriarchy:

Matriarchy, like Patriarchy, means that the Women are in charge, which means that when we talk about rape and misogyny and the way in which men exert their power wholly over women, Matriarchy means that women exert their power wholly over men on an individual level and as an entire population of the females of humanity.

So when I read things online with the tone, "Men need to start taking it upon themselves to teach other men how not-to rape women," I want to throw up.

Men will always rape Women.

Men are larger.

Men are stronger.

Men are stupider.

Men are cowards.

Men are vile.

Even the most-educated men among us are still men with penises that rule over them and everything they do, think about and pursue.

In Matriarchy, men are not our protectors.

In Matriarchy, as a group, we Women are more than capable of protecting each other.

In Matriarchy, Women, as a whole, work together to both sniff out and eject these fuckers who think that their penises make them both "better" than women and "entitled" to our pussies.

In feminism:

WOMEN ARE THE RULERS OF WOMEN'S BODIES, TOGETHER, COLLECTIVELY, AS A WHOLE.

In feminism:

ALL WOMEN ARE THE WOMAN OF HUMANITY.

So don't fucking come around here finger-wagging about how it's somehow the responsibility of men to eradicate sex-crimes against Women.

The stats read as such: 1 in 4 Women have been victims of sexual abuse.

I'd argue that 100% of Women have experienced sexual intimidation, like Kim K and the way she described how, while being robbed, she was mentally preparing herself to be raped. She wasn't raped by her robbers (not to say she's never survived rape), but she thought she would be. This is what I am arguing has happened to 100% of ALL WOMEN, because it's happened to me, and I didn't tell anyone about it, because I wasn't raped, but I was sexually intimidated by a man that I trusted for years. 

I eventually told the bodybuddy/lifemate, not because I needed to get it off my chest, but because I realized that I'd never told anybody. It was certainly a traumatic moment, but I honestly didn't think it warranted a reaction to, like, destroy this man, but now, he absolutely acted against me in my worst interest, and now, I'm mulling whether or not to name him, explicitly.

I do not want to name him explicitly, because I have zero interest in ruining his life or anything, cause I do think that men are allowed to have less-than-savory thoughts, and since he didn't go through with it, I wasn't "harmed" so much as I learned a lot that day, for better and for worse.

Also, I don't want him to come after me, right? But ...

I absolutely want to name him explicitly, because I know how important it is to create a sort of "paper trail" about men who are terrible. If he made the move that he did against me, did he finally go through with it with another Woman? If he did, is it somehow my fault for not reporting him to the police? Are the police the people to whom I can report an event like this? Most police are men.

So, no, I wasn't robbed, and I have not survived sexual abuse.

I have, however, survived sexual intimidation, and yes, I feel 1,000% grateful that I have been surrounded by good men my whole life, and that yea, from my perspective, he's an outlier, but if every woman (half the world's human population) has experienced ONE OUTLIER, then he's not an outlier at all, he's rampant.

And here's what happened:

When I was nineteen, I was able to travel to Seoul for a foreign-language exchange program at a Korean university for international Korean adoptees. It was an amazing trip. I met a million people, and the entire program was sublime. And I met this guy, Mike, on this trip. He was mormon. He was a recruiter for Boeing. He traveled to college campuses all over the world to recruit for Boeing. I think that he was maybe in his mid-to-late twenties when we met. He was friendly to both me and a friend of mine and everyone around us.  And we connected through fbook. He kept tabs on me, and over the course of the next few years, he'd message me to see if me and the friend were available cause he was going to be in Denver, Boulder, wherever I was at that time. 

He, the friend and I all met up the first time in Denver together. He was in town visiting the University of Denver. We had a great time. He was respectful, fun, charming, you know, a classic, old-fashioned, blonde-haired, blue-eyed, all-american boy. The three of us met up a few times in the Denver area, cause he came through the area every year, cause well, Colorado has some really good science-focused schools, etc.

He messaged me another time when he was in Boulder, visiting the University of Colorado, and I was attending CU at the time. The friend was not available, cause she'd moved to Seoul by this point, and so I called my mom and asked her what she thought about me going out alone with this guy. My mom (the adopted one) was thrilled at the prospect that he was "mormon, blonde, and all-american," cause that meant that he was more conservative, a religious guy, which meant that, in my mom's mind, he was "good."

So I took him up on his offer to meet up for lunch. It wasn't a date in my mind. He was older. Just a friend. Some guy I met internationally. And that's really fucked up, Lady. I'd interacted with him about a dozen times in a public setting and about half a dozen times in more-private settings. I felt safe enough to grab lunch, in the middle of the day, in a town where people knew me, I was expected to show up places, my neighbors knew my car, etc., etc., &c. 

I was safe.

We met at Whole Foods, cause I didn't want him to get the wrong impression by picking me up at my apartment, plus I lived alone, so I didn't really want anyone to know where I lived, in general. And that's all I remember until we were back in the Whole Foods parking lot, cause he was dropping me off after lunch. 

I do not remember where we went to lunch.

I do not remember what we talked about.

I remember nothing about that day except what happened when he dropped me off.

I don't even remember driving/parking/waiting in the parking lot before we went to lunch, but I know that I must have driven there and parked, cause that's where the event happened.

We were sitting in his truck. He was driving. I was in the front seat.

He parked the truck.

He started to get kinda weepy or weird or something. 

I couldn't put my finger on it.

He started wringing the steering wheel with his hands, and started saying stuff about how much he liked me.

I froze.

I felt like such an idiot for thinking that a man would want to spend time with me for any other reason than being with me, like all the way with me.

He started to look a little frustrated, so I made a move for the door to get out of the car.

He locked the door from his door.

I froze.

He started to pull out of the parking spot and drive away.

And all I remember thinking was, I'm going to die.

The next thing I remember was feeling the car stop at the stop sign at the end of the parking lot and hearing the door unlock, so I grabbed the handle as fast as I could, and I ran to my car. 

I drove home, and told no one.

And that's all I remember.

I never even told the friend about him, because Women friends have been difficult for me to find. That friend of mine liked Mike. I've had negative opinions about guys that my friends are dating, and let's just say, it never goes over well. There's a 100% chance that that friend would have interpreted my telling on him as some sort of brag, that he like likes me, which means he doesn't like her, and there's a 100% chance that she would read this situation like a cunt instead of a Woman friend, cause I've known enough women to know that there are truly so few of us Women out there that these sexual predators keep getting away with shit, because Women do not believe each other.

When we (the bodybuddy/lifemate&i) were living in Longmont, Colorado, USA, we had moved there so that I could attend the Leadership Longmont program for entrepreneurs, etc., etc., etc. The program began in January 2020, so yea, it ended around the end of February, about three months early, lol. Anyway, during one of the first meetings, some idiot for a man was the opening speaker for the day, etc. He started off by setting up a metaphor about people's pain being stored in a file cabinet, that when you're younger, your file cabinet is empty, and as he did this, he pointed to the two high-school seniors, one young Woman, one boy (two of the best young minds in the area were invited to be part of this "adult" business thing), and used them as examples about how they don't have much in their file cabinets, cause they're young. The young woman's face contorted, as did mine, when this idiot of a man opened his mouth. I experienced my trauma at the age of three. My file cabinet was full to the brim before I even knew how to feed myself. So I raised my hand. 

The idiot of a man was thrilled at my participation and called on me. I put my hand down and said, "You have no idea what sort of pain or trauma any person may have experienced, and it makes absolutely no sense that just because you're younger, you've experienced less trauma. Don't assume that they (motioning to the students) don't have as much pain as us just because they're young." He didn't know what to say, and he bumbled his way through the rest of his spiel, sweating, uncomfortable, unable to use the metaphor he'd so "brilliantly" crafted for his presentation, and it was hilarious. 

At the end of the thing that day, the young woman high-school senior approached me. I was thrilled. She walked right up to me even though I could tell she was a bit shy and maybe a bit afraid. She looked at me teary eyed and said, "Thank you for sticking up for me." I smiled, put a hand on her shoulder and said, "I was sticking up for myself, but I'm so happy that my shield protected you, too," and I walked away. She never interacted with me again, directly, but we always smiled and nodded when we saw each other.

It doesn't matter to me if she never thinks of me again. What matters to me is that she was not alone that day in the eyes of that man. She had an ally, and that ally was me. Whether or not she looked weak in the eyes of that man no longer matters, because a Strong-Ass Woman is behind her. She is not alone in his eyes. He is not seeing her as one-to-one. He now knows that it is Two against his meager one. I wasn't standing up for her to see me. I was standing up for HIM to see me. And the message was clear, "BACK THE FUCK UP. She is not weak, and SHE IS NOT ALONE!"

And Elitist Cunts, like Anna Wintour, believe that only White women deserve Matriarchal protection, and some White women live to uphold the Patriarchy, like Ghislaine Maxwell, and they are the Enemy of Women, and so we also need to rid the world of these types of women.